Here i sit two days before my son, my oldest, my challenging difficult brilliant mini man begins first grade. He and i are both hitting milestones this week. Today i ran to the grocery store for our favorite deli turkey for school lunches (his and mine) and peeked at the liquor section… my son in tow… and i bought vodka. I didn’t just buy vodka, i perused, meandered, and compared. I decided on Watermelon Vodka. I was excited to try it from the moment i picked up the bottle! I had to cross all the way to the other side of the store to get the lemonade to put it in.
As i was approaching the cash registers i started wondering if i should feel guilty for buying this in front of him. The closer i got to the registers, the more the bottle began to feel like a bong. The bags of turkey were beginning to resemble a dime bag. Not that i know what this is, to be clear. My knowledge is based strictly on R rated movies watched with my 6 year old.
But seriously, i had a whole internal war with myself over whether or not i should feel guilty. Initially i didn’t, but because i didn’t, i started feeling like i was in the wrong so the guilt built and eventually took hold.
but let’s be clear. i still bought it.
Ever since i discovered what a Moms Group is, i’ve been hearing the sung praises of a glass of wine after the kids are put down.
That wine has to get to the house some way. I am pretty sure it’s not mail-order. Do wine drinking moms have guilt about their purchases? Or is it strictly on the kid-free grocery runs.. those mythological trips.
My son sees his dad drink beer now and then
.. i say that with my tongue firmly lodged in my cheek
weekends, and with dinner usually are when my husband sucks down a cold one. it’s known in our house as ‘stinkybeer’. One whiff and all curiosity is doused.
So why, then, do i have to feel guilty about a bottle of vodka? Is it the paper bag? Is it linked to my recycling guilt? Nope. Sadly, that’s much easier to get around.
I’ll have to ponder this more as i sip my lemonade watermelon vodka ‘juice’ before hitting the sack and sleeping like a baby. Total added bonus, the ability to sleep through the night !! Why didn’t i start drinking sooner ?!!