Lately i’ve been on a hormone roller coaster that has me doing loopty loops and roundabouts. I can’t explain it, i’m just feeling it. It’s always around when i ovulate. In addition to having some cramping when i ovulate, i get to have super PMS twice a month, it seems. This is a new development. It’s been hard to differentiate between the mental state of my husband traveling, or hormones, or having a 2 year old, or having a 15 year old in the house that is my husband’s. It’s a cornucopia of possibilities, how can you choose just one?!
So all day today i’ve been on the verge of tears. No exact reason, but a lot of little ones, i suppose.
So i go to pick up my son from school, and driving home from a mandatory Target please-fix-my-mental-state run , we went down the ever-present construction street. It’s the closest to our street, and they’ve been building 2 condo buildings since we moved here. It’s been a bit of a pain, but not always entirely impassable.
So today, i’m a respectful distance behind a teenager on a bike. I’m slowly ambling down the road behind her and there’s an oncoming car the hardhat traffic director has stopped. Since that car was stopped, i continued on my merry way. The man directing traffic (a construction worker, not a cop) is throwing up these confusing hand signals. “stop” go ahead “stop” go ahead “STOP”
Then he’s walking toward my van with this “Are you a f-king IDIOT?!” look on his face.
I’m totally confused at this point. I roll my window down and he puts his hand up and says, “I”m telling you to STOP to let the girl on the bike go!”
the girl on the bike was a car length in front of me.
“Giving confusing hand signals, there, man.”
He just kept looking at me, and then gives an equally muddled signal for both of the cars to continue on.
“Oh my gosh!” as i roll up my window mentally spewing a days worth of frustration at him.
Then my child pipes up from the back seat and says, “Mom! Don’t yell at him, he’s been working hard all the days building these buildings!”
Seriously ?!! THIS is the person you clue into as a hard worker and, i don’t know, say ….. ummm . … YOUR MOTHER?!
“It doesn’t matter that he’s working hard, he’s not doing a good job directing traffic.”
Apparently my son is also on the hormonal coaster because he begins to yell at me. “You’re not being nice! You are frustrating me, and i thought we were going to do something fun when we got home!!!”
We continue to drive up the street holding back tears. Did i mention how ridiculous this is ?! Logically i know it makes no sense to be so sensitive. Emotionally, i cannot keep it together to save my life right now.
Apparently i need to wear a hard hat, walkie talkie, and orange vest to get any respect around here. …
Or is this just all my yelling coming back to haunt me ? Because, afterall, everyone knows yelling at/around your children can cause emotional epilepsy and stifled growth. (a throwback to my last entry for those of you not entirely following along here)
One thought on “Hormone Overload”
Ahhh, hang in there Sharra. Being a mother, let alone being a woman, is super hard some days. Nobody seems to understand or to take the time to try to understand. Then, you always feel like you’re the bad guy or the crazy one. Well, you’re neither! Tomorrow is another day and things generally look different in e morning.