After someone close to you has passed, it’s easy to fall into the mentality that everything is a sign. When my dad died, there was a beautiful hawk that circled over all of us at the grave side during the burial. We all took it as a sign from him. A sign that he was ok, that he was watching down on us, etc etc. I imagine it meant a little something different to everyone there. You tend to find what you need when you need it the most. Reassurance, comfort, peace.
Maybe not immediately, but you find it. If you look close enough.
Last night I had multiple dreams about my friend, Crystal, who passed away this past Spring. It’s not unusual to dream about people you miss, but for me it’s unusual to wake up, and go back to sleep, and have a whole different dream about the same person. After two (remembered) dreams, i woke up. When i got back to sleep, I dreamed about her husband.
It’s like I couldn’t escape her memory.
I woke up promising myself to write to her mom and check on her. Something I had been meaning to do for the past two months, but selfishly let my own hectic life get in the way. I woke up and got busy with the kids. I was oddly moody and a little grumpy despite having had a great evening the night before.
I got wrapped up in taking my son to the orthodontist and other morning necessities. On the drive to drop off my son at at school, Depeche Mode came on the radio.
This was one of the driving tapes Crystal and I had on virtual repeat for years. One of many of their tapes.
How often is Depeche Mode played on the radio? Not too often in my opinion. I remembered my promise to myself to write to Crystal’s mom, and remembered that I forgot to follow through on my own promise.
So needless to say, when I got home, I wrote that email right away with the little anecdote that even from beyond, she is still more than willing – and apparently able – to continue to kick my butt to get something done when she wants it.
I don’t know if it was all a coincidence or not. Seems like a lot of coincidae all wrapped into one morning. That seems less than ordinary, so i’m going to go with the more exciting possibility that she wanted me to check in on her mom and let her know someone is thinking of her and the upcoming holiday and wanting her to simply know good thoughts are with her. From here and ‘up there’.
Whether we make something innocent and innocuous into what we need that thing to be, or it’s just a happenstance, take what you need to make your own essence meaningful. In doing this today, i’ve managed to ease my own mind, and hopefully the mind of my dear friend’s mother who i’m sure is going through a hard few days. A two ‘fer!