Lobby Letter

Published January 17, 2014 by sarcasmica

Dear Fellow Special Parent,

Each week we sit in the same waiting room. Each week you drive me crazy!
Guess what? You might feel the need to overcompensate, but we are all of a similar mind here. We ALL have outstanding kids that need a little extra magical mystical attention.

You are not the only parent who is aware. You are endlessly smug and supercilious in an amazingly hair-raising and grating way.
Each week the same warm and good intentioned parent sits and commiserates with you.

I still have no idea why
Each week you are superior and condescending to her.

We are in this waiting room for one hour/week every week. It gives me lots of time to let my imagination run wild and free.

I picture giving you a shot that immobilizes you, and then I put you in a chair in front of non-stop Jackass movies.

How about I put that knowledge and superiority to work and throw you into a 12th grade English class in Compton. ..Go! Work your magic! At the very least, you might get to add to your vocabulary.

I imagine us sitting around a moat. Every week has the same outcome.
I throw you in…..after i’ve covered you in honey and unleashed demon ants at your feet.

I have had various stories run through my head. Oddly, they all have the same outcome: you become silent.

I like the version where you are put in a room with social Mensa members with a sense of humor. They show you how unremarkable your vast knowledge really is.

You are smarter than I, I can admit that. I’m ok with that. I would just love to be there the day you meet people who show you intelligence does not equal superiority.

Take it from the lowly common lady who only possesses a common intelligence, shut up! It’s working against you and makes you look like a tool. The female equivalent of a Dbag.

Peace be with you,
-Sarcasmica

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