Fresh Meat

Published March 28, 2014 by sarcasmica

We are getting new neighbors… like now. As I type this there is a U-Haul in the neighboring driveway.

Please, Little Baby Jesus, let them be normal, not uptight, friendly and non-judgmental in a relatable and coffee-talk-judgmental of only those I dont like type of way.

Please let their kids be fun and respectful and non-spazoids. Kids that wont taunt our dog to leave the yard and bite their noses off. Children I wont have to worry finding fireworks in one hand and my cat in the other. Perhaps, if I may be so bold as i’m already writing a wish list, even a family we would enjoy inviting over to BBQ…?

We will be seeing lots of each other, as neither property has a fenced back yard, but hopefully we can all live respectfully clothed and decent through those back porch windows…. or at the very least, let them be near-sighted so as to avoid those rare playful clandestine rendezvous on this side of the trough.

Here’s hoping for a miracle!


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