Summer Approaches

Published May 14, 2014 by sarcasmica

This mosquito smorgasbord has had it, and it’s only May. Thankfully we are no longer in Austin where the ‘skeeters’ are pretty much year round and the size of a watermelon. The season is fairly short here, but damned if those buggers dont feast on this bodacious bod every day! I’ve had to Pinterest remedies and tonight the cure du jour is dry soap. So far so good.

Also on the agenda is sweating your balls off. If I had ’em, i’m sure they’d be gone by now. My poor son is navigating his way through life with the proper anatomy and i’m afraid im not much help there. As in down there. If we do not get a manual with our babies, we should at least get a Genitals for Dummies when we have the opposite sex child. I’ve already told my husband he’s on duty around 11 or 12 years old for the puberty lesson. I can coach and cheer and advise away on the girls (or whatever) when it gets there, but I cannot deal with the actual physical logistics. We just recently began using the word ‘penis’. My husband nearly choked on his spoonful of peanut butter when I said it aloud while talking to our son.

It sounds immature and totally irresponsible that I cant handle that stuff, but thats just how I roll.

So today we had a combination of three hot days running around at recess, plus P.E., plus new swim lessons began. After the evening shower and soap, there was some sort of reaction that had my poor child screaming in pain and refusing to pee.
😦
We got through it, but he ended up going to bed in the hopes it all remedies itself magically overnight. I cant say I am thinking any differently.

Bears are beginning to roam around now and I have no idea what i’ll do at my first sighting. I know getting a picture will be my second response – after pissing myself.

Heat here means fans. Not many places have a/c and as a result, my son’s nose will bleed more regularly. I picked him up from school yesterday and he had TP shoved up his nose. TWO nosebleeds and one around 3am the same morning.

The last issue i am having is regarding sacks. Egg sacks. I have had two on the porch the past 2 days. The whole concept is alien and horrifying. I am a city girl through and through. A beach city girl, no less, where sand fleas should be the worst fate you deal with…. and sharks, i suppose…and jellyfish. Well at least those things do not crawl into your ears and lay eggs. I digress.

The other summer prep annoyance here is the Road Construction season. There are 3 main roads that lead us to civilization and all are under construction for weeks on end. One wont be finished until September. September! If it’s not pouring down rain or humid and boiling, there are back hoes and hard hats out feverishly getting it all done.

Spring has sprung and so has my patience.

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