The Quiet

Published October 9, 2014 by sarcasmica

Being a mother has really brought to light all the meanings and feelings associated with this word. It is blissful at the end of a hard day of homework, lunches, friend drama, missed assignments. It is equally blissful in the early morning, I’m told, before creatures are stirring. I, however, cannot function pre-dawn so I try not to subject people to that side of me.

It can be terrifying. When you have a newly crawling baby who you turned away from to grab something off the counter to find her gone. Gone and only a stinky diaper trail to find her. Taking your children to McDonald’s, changing tables to get away from the bathroom, and turn and find silence because your daughter followed a stranger into the men’s bathroom – true story – Terrifying.

It can be cathartic. Days of your child coughing and sniffling and sneezing, and then when all the medicine and “rest” and staying home from school works and you finally have that night of quiet. All night.

It can be heart breaking. When sounds of babies crying and siblings fighting and screaming about not wanting homework once rang through your halls. One day you wake up from a fitful night’s sleep to find no snotty noses or pee pee dance to greet you before you’ve had your coffee… and you’d give anything to have that time back.Ā Ā  .. or so i’m told. I’m still in the trenches, so by right I do not have to appreciate these moment quite yet.

It’s a bittersweet payoff after the hustle and bustle of readying for a partner’s business trip. The hurry up and pack mentality and destruction that involves finding every last piece needed before the quiet calm after the door is shut and the cab pulls away.

That sweet well-earned quiet as you sip your first cup of coffee the first morning of school after a long hot antsy bored summer. Elating.

This morning I did a mini experiment. I woke to my ratty-haired smiling daughter wanting TV. I usually grab my phone and do the email/facebook/weather phone check while she watches something. That way i’m fully human before having to interact or use a toaster. I left out the facebook part of my routine today. I glanced at CNN through squinty eyes hoping not to see something ghastly and thoroughly depressing. It was a decent news day. When it was time to get ready, I had no feelings of guilt (for not working out at 5am) or invisibility (no comments or likes) or being insufficient (no ghost/Frankenstein sandwiches prepared for my kid’s lunches). I remained unperturbed despite being awake in the dark. I even stayed even-tempered enough to handle my daughter’s fight not to wear her jeans, even though they were the only clean pants in her entire room because I fail at laundry every day. The FB thing is my own issue. I am far too competitive and jealous to look at it first thing in the morning when my mood is not the greatest.

I dropped my son off at school and came back to get my daughter settled with yogurt. My husband was upstairs packing. Instead of sitting with my coffee in front of the TV and seeing all the skinny, put together, business suit, perfectly coiffed news ladies, I made an egg and toast and sat at my dining room table. I had a decent breakfast, looked out my window and watched Fall happen. It was my favorite kind of morning. Foggy. Crisp. The leaves have turned here and are beginning to fall everywhere. We waited and went through so much before getting this house. I sat, ate, and appreciated the fact that I was sitting in my own house. Looking at my own yard. I let myself just appreciate what I have and felt content and happy with life in general.

The reason mothers appreciate quiet for the good reasons is that it is so fleeting. So now i’m going to play with my wonderfully loud and happy four year old daughter as all of her animals are getting married. What can be better than a Bear/Elephant wedding?! How about a Chameleon/Cat wedding? Got it. The grand finale is the double caterpillar/fish wedding and kangaroo/jaguar wedding. Is 10:30 too early for an open bar ?

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8 comments on “The Quiet

      • Yeah. I’ve never seen anybody have so many problems with WordPress. Maybe you should just kill this blog and start a new one with the same name. Or not. I don’t know. Awards are good for getting a good base following you, and now you know it works, at least. Just never change this theme! It can be your thing. Or send out a note to everyone when you change your theme again so everybody knows to go on your site and hit the button again.
        The best way to get new followers from an award is to put whatever you feel is your best work at the top of your page, so even if it’s old, stick it up there so when people stop by they see your best immediately. Also, I’ll reblog everybody’s award answer when they’re done, so it’ll be up on my page. You’ve just had a hard start electronically. People aren’t seeing you, so we’ll fix it.

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      • I changed my theme like 30 times in a day and nothing happened. Then I went back to the original theme, and haven’t touched it since. No problems, though. Check in with your widgets and stats.

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  • Another thing to do is to go on other peoples sites, and steal their followers. Get your blog to where you want it, (like cleaning when your mother in law comes over) go to my page, and start checking out those people. Find some you like, follow them, make comments when you like what they’ve read, and suddenly you’ll be making tons of friends. Don’t be sad about no likes or comments. Your writing is awesome.

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  • Heya! I have been away on hols for a week. I got this and the others, but I do think that you may have ‘dropped off’ and I had to ‘re-follow’ you when you changed theme. That seems to happen with a few blogs that I have been following. I am so bloody untechnical that I have no idea why! I have been pondering changing my theme but a now thinking maybe not. Mimosas, hello Mumma! Good point Naptime! Being in the trenches is a place that strangely, I do miss now that the lads are at school all day. I really grieved my baby going to big school. However, I don’t think it’s any help knowing that when you are there. It’s beautiful and exhausting, all at the same time. Just like WordPress them changes. šŸ˜

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