I have a 4 year old daughter, and here’s what she’s taught me:
1. You can fart whenever you want, however loud you want. In fact, the louder, the better! Especially since you are of the female persuasion. You get a lot more credit for it.
2. If you are mad, be mad. Scream, shout, fist-pound, floor flop until EVERYONE understands you are mad…the reason doesnt matter half as much as the volume.
3. Eat. Whatever and whenever. ..except at the table. Nevereverever eat at the table
4. You can never have too many stuffed animals.
5. Revel in your baths. Bubbles are amazing and have healing properties..also, it is possible to perfect the art of bathing and still not getting clean.
6. Everthing has the capacity to be a toy. On our family vacation to Orlando, the kids bickered for three days straight. We went to Logan’s Roadhouse on the third night, and they played with shelled peanuts for an hour and a half and never fought. PEANUTS! Who knew?!
7. There is never too much pink. Patterns do not matter, either.
8. Sparkle.
9. Brothers are good for a few things: Minecraft, Forts, and Super Heroes (my girl’s fave is The Hulk)
10. Bathing suits are just a formality.
Sarcasmica 