I’ve finally done it. I made a reservation for our family to go a’campin’.

In other words, we are about to spend a whole lotta money to be homeless for a weekend.

Maybe the kids will appreciate all the plug in devices after this trip?…… yea right.

I just need to go find a beekeepers outfit. I discovered this past weekend that I have a very annoying reaction to wasp stings. My finger is still swollen and red, angry, and itchy after three days. F*cking nature.

An equal parts brilliant & a-hole wasp decided to build a homestead underneath our porch railing. It’s right beside a particularly pungent hibiscus bush and in the corner of the porch we rarely visit. I was minding my own business on Saturday spraying for weeds over the railing when all of a sudden:  BZZZZZZZZZZZZ !!!!

Instant swarm.

Having only ever been stung by a dead bee, onto which I fell at recess when I was 8, I was not at first certain what was happening. I still thought it was black flies, which I have seen mulling around and pestering us on the porch.

Once I was stung, I squealed like a little girl, let go of the weed jug, and ran.

THEN I realized what it was … sort of. They looked like bees, but there was no stinger. Just an open angry red circle on my finger. I went over to the neighbor who’s husband has removed wasp nests from their property to get some advice.

I washed the sting, and just waited… what else are you supposed to do?! I should have put a poultice on it to absorb the venom, but I didn’t think about that until the next day. After about half an our my lips started feeling puffy and tingly, so I dug up some Benadryl finally.

My son was stung on his shoulder last summer, and after the initial screaming and sobbing and wailing, it was fine. By the next day he was back to playing. (inside)

So the nest was sprayed and knocked down, just to find the last chamber – with all the larvae & queen – was still up underneath the railing. I hose sprayed and poisoned until everything was obliterated. Then refused to do any other yard work.

So here I sit three days later waiting for my finger to fall off. It’s itching like a m-er f-er. It’s puffy from my knuckle up to the first joint. I’ve ibuprofened, after-bite salve’d, benadryl-d, iced… what’s left?! Amputation?!

So yea .. i’m thrilled to be celebrating outdoors for my son’s birthday next month, and then camping in July. I will be the one in a beekeeper outfit dousing everything in peppermint, bug spray, poison, and flames…without an index finger. (weighing the options of cancer vs wasp stings)

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