What The Dog?

I saw that my blog randomly had one user and 65 views, but no comments or ‘likes’ or anything… .which one of you kinky voyeurs is trying to be stealth?

Back to your randomly scheduled read …..

When we moved to our current house, my daughter begged and begged for a  another hamster. She had one yyyyyyears ago and only for about 4 months before it croaked, costing me $160. I’m sure there’s a post about it, but I have no idea what it was called and I’m too lazy to find a link. It was around February of 2016 or 2017. (?!?!)  Anyhoo, what would telling a six year old “No” to something they feel in their gut they should have accomplish? Nothing. I said, “YES! If you can keep your room clean for 30 days IN A ROW, you can have a pet.” I knew this would never happen, she’d stop asking and I could stop saying “No.” 18,000 times a day.

Two years and Corona virus later, I finally had it with her stuffed animal graveyard of a room and we overhauled it. I mean we cleaned out drawers, the closet, rearranged stuffies, secretly removed stuffies, the whole nine yards. About four days after her room cleaning – that she “helped” with by crying and sobbing “Noooo, I LOVE that one!” any time I looked like I was going to get rid of a stuffed animal – she announces, “Mom! I’m so excited that I already have 4 days done out of my 30 and I can get a hamster!!”

What the Stuffy?! This li’l cretin had completely tricked me with her brilliant and admirable mind into jump starting her evil hamster plot to take over the world!! That little genius! I rolled with it, though because what pandemic 9 year old can stick to a plan that involves keeping anything clean?

Mine. Apparently the answer is my kid.

Tip for all you parents who think you are brilliant: You’re not. They are smarter than us far earlier than they should be, and they are going to take over before you expect it. Treat them well because they are the ones determining which nursing home you get put in.

30 days later, she was ready. My husband – Godbless’im – stepped in around day 30 + 3 and said, “Hamster? Really? You sure? How about you and I find a dog to adopt instead? If you can go 30 more days without blowing your top every time there is an obstacle in front of you, we will get you a dog.” You can just take a wild guess what that answer was, and how hard I thunked him on the head when she accepted.


I explained a detailed list of what this new dog would be getting from the two co-conspirators and not me. (It was a long list)

Well if you have even thought about getting a pet during this pandemic, I think you can predict how the story starts….. there were none. There were no dogs to be gotten. We already have two, one with stage 1 kidney failure, so I was not eager to chase this train. The search began with my husband, but as he works while I am “enjoying” my “summer” I felt after a week I could help out.

We filled out miles of applications, we sent scads of emails, we had Petfinder on lock. Daily searches, y’all. Daily. We thought we were a shoe-in for a perfect pup to find out later there were 50 applicants for the dog. We tried again for another seemingly perfect specimen of rescued glory. “Sorry, there are 30 people interested in him. It’s not looking good for your Invisible Fence having family.”

Rescue groups are living their best high and mighty lives, folks. BEST. It’s a great thing for the animals, but it’s a shitty situation if you have a 9 year old who worked VERY hard for 60 days keeping a room clean (and keep in mind she is a FHoA – Future Hoarder of America) AND 30 days of not flipping her lid when frustrated …. and she has a VERY frustrating big brother. She wants her payoff like yesterday.

This scenario played out over and over and over again. The crap I have seen Rescue Orgs put on a dog posting is borderline offensive and rude and completely dismissive. We  I tried all shelters in a 100 mile radius. (See how NOT involved I got?) Again I will say this is the best time to be a street walkin’ dog, but hell if you are looking for a reasonable small to medium sized dog who wont tear a kid’s face off or kill your other animals. The shelters had 0 – 5 dogs. I only saw one with 5, 2 of which had already been adopted, btw.


We ended up going the breeder purchase route after weeks of rollercoaster ups and downs wearing down an already worn out nerve system from the pandemic.

I came across an ad for the funniest faced little long haired chihuahua. It’s funny twofold because 1. It’s a chihuahua and 2. My husband can’t stand little dogs, but the amount of attitude in this face was magnetic. We responded to the ad along with one or two other inquiries. My husband joked, “With my luck, the chihuahua lady will respond first.”

And she did! πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€ πŸ˜€

One two hour drive later, we meet with the breeder and dog in a parking lot. We had asked her to please remember a collar so we could get him on a leash and see how he did (He’s 1.5 yrs old) The woman sets the dog down on a strip of grass with no leash or collar, and the terrified creature takes off and lands in a blackberry hedge. She was shocked and mortified, as she never anticipated the 3lb dog to be petrified in a parking lot beside a busy road right off a freeway. Shocker! We continue with the meet, things go pretty well, but I noticed a squinty eye. When I asked if he had any allergies, she said No. Never an issue.

We drive this little peanut home and immediately start to fall in love with his li’l face. He’s very mellow but shows a spark here and there, so we’re hopeful he’ll be a good fit. As the evening goes on, the eye starts to close up a little more and by the next day it’s covered in thick crusty green goop.

No bueno, li’l chihuahua! We call vets, no appointments for a week. I called Emergency Vets in the area and hear 2 explain there will be a 4-5 HOUR wait and you must be on the premises to have the animal treated. One ER Vet said they closed doors to incoming patients because they were too full.

What the Hades?! Apparently all the dogs we were passed up for decided to have emergencies all at the same time?! It was nuts.

The breeder agrees to take the pup to her Vet the next state over. ( ?? !) I just had to drive it back 2 hours south at 11pm to hand him over. I did. (Please burn the paper stating how much I would not be dealing with if we get dog #3)

The next morning I get a hysterical and panicked phone call at 11 am that the breeder was turned away from her trusted vet due to overbooking. They would not see the dog. I talk her off a ledge, call around and find the same issue in OR that we experienced the day before. “No appointments available.” And that was not including the three vets I called who simply shut off their phones. “Voice mail box is full.” or just a straight busy signal.

WHAT is going on?!

I find one vet willing to give their last ER spot to us if the breeder can call and confirm right away. I text a pin, giving her all the info, and take photos of the vax in the event the breeder didn’t have a copy since obviously, no one was answering phones so records could not be requested. She thanks me , she says she’ll take the appointment even thought it means she’s hanging out for hours upon hours waiting to be seen.

An hour later I get a text that she was so frazzled she forgot to confirm the appointment and it’s now been taken.

OMG. I’m not gonna lose it. I’m not gonna lose it. I’m not gonna lose it……

I find her another option … already long story long, I will say the next day she had him seen and thankfully he has a very treatable eye infection, possibly resulting from an injury from ejecting himself directly into a blackberry bush 48hrs prior.

IF all things go well from here, we will be able to have him back to us in two days so we can see if the meds are working.

Moral of the story ….. just go with the hamster.

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