Another Goal

Published January 2, 2014 by sarcasmica

My other goal (please note the lack of the word ‘resolution’) is to fit into my fat jeans before summer.
Let that sink in
It’s sort of like looking back at younger pictures of yourself. Remember how fat you felt in high school?! Who knew in reality that would be the thinnest version of yourself?!
… aside from all of your mom’s friends and grandparents of course. What the hell did those old fogies know
Looking back at pictures from when I was dating my husband… waaaay back nearly twelve years ago, I thought I could stand to lose a few. Now I can stand to lose a lot. Those honeymoon pics and pre-baby pictures are wistful as well. I had no idea the POST pregnancy and in-the-mommy-trenches could be so vastly different.
Mom groups were the first places I heard the term “muffin top”. And i lived in a beachy, sunny Southern California community conducive to marathons and stroller strides. I was a three tiered wedding cake body amidst a sea of cute little muffin tops. It became comical to watch these women who had never before considered mom jeans and crocs now have to wade through Spanx and concealing yoga clothes. The frantic conversations discussing the ups and downs of herbal weight loss versus juice diets.
Needless to say my tiered cake tummy was out of place in the sunny parent club bakery.
So now here I sit at ‘too big’ this side of adulthood. Life seems to have settled a bit more. For the first time in five years, we have managed to remain in one state. Things are looking promising, and hopefully this time next month I can squeeze my giant caboose into what once were my comfy buffet jeans.
Living in the northwest, i must ignore the urge to hide my body beneath sweaters and hoodies and pretend not to notice getting bigger and bigger, and instead find a trail to get lost on… with a toddler and 2nd grader in tow…

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