Maturity and wisdom come with age, right? Well currently my wisdom is teaching me rum makes me snappy and grumpy. In particular Malibu Rum.

It’s that or the children I seem to be constantly left alone with. The rum and the children coincidentally have been going together this weekend.

Maturity and wisdom are telling me to stick with Vodka. Vodka has no adverse affect on my moods, not if i’ve done it right.

My kids started the day fine. Last night and this morning they played with toys together. My 12 year old will still play with (Five Nights At Freddy’s) stuffies with his sister. It’s pretty cool … they are murderous horror game/story stuffies, but whatevs, right?

We watched a movie while eating lunch together, everything was going fine. I should have had the kids go outside afterwards but my 8 year old has her annual croupy cough happening right now. There have been no other symptoms, no fever, no cold, zero physical issue aside from the barking cough. Nothing the docs can help with. I cannot send them outside to run around while she’s barking like a frigging seal.

Instead I had the bright idea to play UNO with them. Three highly competitive people playing a card game. What could go wrong?

Let’s just say it ended over an hour later without any tears, but I helped myself to a pina colada and 30 minutes of quiet times for both kids.

Dinner was can ravioli for one and eggos for the other. They got to watch me eat their coveted sugary cereal for entertainment. Tomorrow morning they will figure out it was the last of it. (It was actually damage control as there was only enough for one bowl. Call me a fixer)

I picture myself as a pretty kick ass mom until afternoons/nights like these. I do my best to filter what I say, but fuck, it’s a lot! And it’s not like I have some jet-setting business trip to look forward to where I get to be independently productive with back slaps and congratulations for doing an outstanding job. Nope. I just get more of it. More of it with the possibility of going back to work which brings up all kinds of heretofore unneeded logistics.

But it’ll all be fine. It will. It’s just the *now* that is shitty.

Currently both kids are in separate bath tubs while I take a minute to breathe. If they sleep in the tub can I call it a water bed?

Since the kids have quieted and are currently zen in their respective tubs, the bird has taken it upon himself to shriek at me. I guess my quiet time is done now.


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